Video Response

http://www.iamsecond.com/#/seconds/Chris_Plekenpol/
A Response to a video confession of the next Billy Ghram


First you did not fail in the first four minutes of combat. And as you are now aware that it had nothing to do with god or you. In fact the names of heroes that are forever written on the walls of history were never made by the etchings of those you shielded and protected but rather those who stood tall and gave the orders that others would not give, with great concern. You were incredibly successful. How you coped with those first days has nothing to do with your actions during command. It matters not to those who served with you or those around you to know about how you cope with your own internal thoughts and spirit; it is way more important for us to see you stand solid in the faith or choices and in god. It is here where you can fail, to stumble when faced with these decisions, with these impossibilities of a Christian life, no matter how far removed from all that you know and have been comforted by. To know that Gods strength is a direct reflection of your actions at every moment. To know that as you take your stand he weeps in admiration of his very creation. Standing in front of the wreckage of the car bomb waiting for its imminent destruction and looking at the very actor that gave his life to kill you, and deciding not to save him is not a failure in anyone’s eyes including God’s. It is not fair to compare your failure of sacrifice to that of Christ’s. In fact is the anathema of what he would have wanted. Do not be so vain as to believe that the choice of sacrifice is always a martyr’s death, or you trap yourself to the same chains that our enemy is shackled to. Christ died for an inherent failure of the flesh, to insure that our ascendance would be maintained and that his example would allow us to have a human template in which to emulate to our best. Your choice though covered with the militarisms of not dying for your enemy, or even better “fuck him, let him die,” is merely a façade. The decision in all honesty was made with much less emotion than either of the last two statements provide. It was the calm cool rationalization that you could not order another soldier to grab him when the impending risk that ended up killing him was too high. That being said, your choice to do it yourself would have been worse than the ordering of a soldier. The loss of the senior man on the ground would have been a huge success for the enemy and the ultimate gesture in futility. You had no choice but to watch and pray. And even though you do not believe that you prayed for him, you did, that night laying awake you prayed for him, later in your dreams, you prayed for him, and even today in a video confession of a wrong that you never committed. Never degrade your achievements on earth, do not be so vain as to feel that the martyrdom that would have ended both his and your life compares to that of Christ who saved generations of humanity, saved those that have committed no sins maliciously. Take strength in the understanding that God weeps with pride of his creation when you are able to look at your enemy and wish you could save him. Take strength in the knowledge that God takes strength in you. Stand tall and do not be apologetic about the series of choices that brought you and many of your soldiers home while accomplishing the mission to the best of your understanding. To do anything less will force those not as strong as you to throw themselves back into the flames of self doubt. Remember always that the sacrifice of gods is the glorious relinquishment of their ultimate power, for you it would have been a needless waste, a small gesture that would have been lost in the moment. Martyrdom to be true must have a much greater price than your life.

Love ya brother…… and don’t worry I haven’t switched sides……

Snowy Woods

Every once in awhile one looks around and wonders where he is and how he got there. Of course, he knows where he resides and if he is lucky, even his place in the world. But it is a rare moment that he notices he is in too deep and thus snaps away the façade that he is in control of his situation. It is akin to walking through the forest and enjoying the warmth of the sun on his skin and the excitement of a rushing river through the rocks only to wake up and realize that it is getting dark, he is naked and he is without shelter. When life strips away these vestments of control and leaves him stark to the world he tries to remember what this was all about and how long he has been wandering in this forest. He therefore not only wonders how he arrived in this forest but starts to entertain the possibility that he has always been there. Why is he there? What is he trying to accomplish? Which way is up? Which way is down? In this vertiginous environment he has no way of focusing his motivations and decrypting his bearing. He is lost in the forest now and not enjoying the scenery at all. The trees scrape at his skin and the sharp rocks and cold river are threats that could be his undoing. Where is the control? Where is the preparation? How does he live one life at the top of the motivational and moral ladder while living his other in the dark alley of turpitude? Does he know what is right? Of course. His choice to adhere to part of the social pattern of accepted behavior and eschew the rest of it leaves his soul limping. He maintains one strong limb for walking but the other is a shriveled vestige that inhibits him from taking long vigorous strides toward his goals. His weak shortened limb isolates him and ensures that he will never walk in a straight line but is destined to drag himself in circles. He knows that he does this to himself and still perpetuates the behavior of his self-fulfilling prophecy without understanding or even asking; why. The auto destructive choices he makes should send a signal to his brain saying “get out of the forest and you will be ok”. He is chooses not to hear the creaking and groaning of the impending cave in over the raucous laughter and fickle impetuous shouts of his temptations. More than a warning, this klaxon of common sense falls on deaf ears that are determined to mask his eventual undoing.
-my friend-